His writing is limited to songs for dead blondes.
- - - Keith Richards (about Elton John)

I'm glad I've given up drugs and alcohol. It would be awful to be like Keith Richards. He's pathetic. It's like a monkey with arthritis, trying to go on stage and look young. I have great respect for the Stones but they would have been better if they had thrown Keith out 15 years ago.
- - - Elton John (about Keith Richards)

If I were married to you, I'd put poison in your coffee.
- - - Lady Astor (to Winston Churchill)
If you were my wife, I'd drink it.
- - - Winston Churchill, in reply

He couldn't ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner.
- - - Johnny Carson (about Chevy Chase)

Well at least he has finally found his true love …what a pity he can't marry himself.
- - - Frank Sinatra (about Robert Redford)

Michael Jackson's album was only called "Bad" because there wasn't enough room on the sleeve for "Pathetic."
- - - The Artist Formerly Known as Prince (about Michael Jackson)

He is so dumb he can't fart and chew gum at the same time.
- - - Lyndon Baines Johnson (about Gerald Ford)

He's a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off.
- - - Lyndon Baines Johnson (about Gerald Ford)

How can they tell?
- - - Dorothy Parker (hearing of Calvin Coolidge's death)

That's not writing, that's typing.
- - - Truman Capote (about Jack Kerouac's literary style)

She turned down the role of Helen Keller because she couldn't remember the lines.
- - - Joan Rivers (about Bo Derek)

My daughter has never forgiven me. for what, I don’t know, because for years, she won’t speak to me. She blackens my name in the press and makes me think abortion is an excellent idea.
---Klaus Kinski on his daughter, Nastassja.

These fellows like Kirk Douglas and Charles Heston, who've played many historical heroes, they can get pretty high and mighty. If you don’t treat them like royalty, they get hurt or angry. They’re happiest when you treat them like a king and act like a humble serf.
---Fred MacMurray on big stars

It proves what they always say: give the public what they want and they’ll come out for it.
---Red Skelton at the very crowded funeral of Columbia Pictures’ head, Harry Cohn, who was despised by many.

Kevin Costner has personality minus.
---Madonna after meeting Kevin Costner

He doesn’t smile, he leers. Not exactly an intellectual, either. for a while, that dropping his pants bit was an effective gimmick for the screen, but any way you measure it, his talent doesn’t add up.
---Cornel Wilde on Richard Gere.

I did not give Lee Majors his start in acting. You can’t pin that one on me. Technically, he hasn’t started acting yet.
---Rock Hudson on Lee Majors

I was particulary stunned by the casting of Cruise, who is no more my Vampire Lestat than Edward G. Robinson is Rhett Bulter.
---Anne Rice on Tom Cruise being cast by the studio as the Vampire Lestat in Interview with a Vampire.

She’s the original good time had by all.
---Bette Davis on Marilyn Monroe

Of course I knew Laurence Olivier and Danny Kaye were having a long term affair.   So did all of London. So did their wives. Why is America always the last to know?
---Peggy Ashcroft on the subject of homosexual lovers in Hollywood

I remember Laurence Olivier asking Dustin Hoffman why he stayed up all night. Dustin, looking really beat, really bad, said it was to get into the scene being filmed that day, in which he was supposed to have been up all night. Olivier said, "My boy, if you’d learn how to act, you wouldn’t have to stay up all night."
---Robert Mitchum on method acting

I did a movie with Duke Wayne and was very surprised to find out he had small feet, wore lifts, and an corset. Hollywood is seldom what it seems.
---Rock Hudson on the image of John Wayne